Being transgender is not a choice. You either are trans, or you're not. However, searching inside yourself to find who you really are, and then accepting yourself can be a long and scary journey.
Are you left handed?
11% of the UK is left handed, they did not choose to be left handed - it's actually an evolutionary advantage which provides a surprise factor to their competitor (before twitter battles and keyboard warriors were a thing).
And of course, you can teach your child at an early age to use their right hand for most tasks to make it 'easier' for them in their teen and adult lives...
This principle can also be used when discussing the issue of being transgender. Nobody chooses to be transgender (PS who in their right mind would voluntarily put themselves through this), you were born trans - just like left handed people. Now, some parents might embrace their kids expressing themselves at a young age - or, just like in the lefty case - make their children fit in with the other kids to make their lives 'easier'.
Now, in no way shape or form am I drawing a correlation between being left handed and being transgender... it's just an example, so please calm down Karen.
What I'm trying to say is, we can choose whether we express our feelings and characteristics. Just like you could learn to do most tasks with your right hand, you could also learn to comply with society's binary views of gender.
Yet, those kids were still born and feel more comfortable and natural using their left hand - it's just that society favours right handed people. Just like they favour cis-gendered people.
We've been around
The indigenous people of Northern America praised individuals who possessed both male and female characteristics. They were named as 'two-spirit' individuals, and are one of the reasons why trans people are seen to be 'naturally occurring' for a lack of a better phrase.
Unfortunately, the binary homophobic and transphobic mindset of the white settlers drove the natives out, and their culture was mainly lost.
This is evidence that trans or non-binary people have existed, and it's only the binary perception of gender and sexuality which oppressed them, and continues to do.
Listen to yourself
Can you remember back to when you were in primary school, and the teacher asked you a question... the teacher said "put your hand up if you agree" and later "put your hand up if you disagree". If you saw that most or almost every kid put their hand up for agree, you would feel a little bit pressured to do the same, right?
But then the teacher asked the class the same question, but this time she asked everyone to close their eyes...
What do you think happened?
The children were no longer influenced by the majority's opinions, and they could truthfully answer the question for themselves.
That's exactly what is happening on a much larger scale in our society.
If everyone is cis-gender (aka not trans), then we are more likely to believe that this is the
'correct' or 'right' way. We are influenced by the norm, and we try to fit into it. Instead, we should be looking inwards, just like those children - closing our eyes and listening only to ourselves.
Being trans is not a choice, embracing it is.
A trans person will always know, or have the feelings of being transgender. It's just about when they learn to love themselves and embracing who they truly are.
If you have any trans friends or family, really speak to them and try to learn from them - especially if they came out at a young age.
These people have been through a LOT at a very young age, and they have been able to truly find themselves in this chaotic world.